Tag Archives: relationships

Children as Capable

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Snowman

If you’re in the Midwest, as I am, winter brings the nightmare of getting dressed for freezing cold weather. There’s not only coats, but boots and snow pants and gloves and scarves and hats. And everything has a specific order of assembly. And you have 15 children to get ready without passing out from overheating.

As we are focusing on our view of children, let’s go through a few questions to help us see how we are viewing the capabilities of the children in our care.

Do you plan extra time for getting dressed and undressed for the weather so you are not taking away valuable outdoor time? Winter outerwear just takes longer. By planning extra time, you avoid the need to rush the children. You can allow them the time they need to learn the new skills of getting ready for a cold outdoors. Rushing is stressful and challenges everyone’s patience.

When a child is struggling with getting dressed, how quickly do you jump in to help? Do you ask first? While we don’t want children to get too frustrated, we do want them to persist and master the skills we are teaching and they are practicing. You show the child respect if, when you see a child struggling, you ask if they need assistance yet. If they say no, then wait and watch. If they are getting more frustrated, ask again. Odds are the child will allow you to help when they reach a level of frustration. Show the child you trust them to let you know when they need help.

Do the children gather their own coats and winter attire? Sometime children can get distracted from the task at hand. When that happens, how do you get them back on track? Do you hand them their coat or point them in the right direction to get it for themselves? Do you believe they can keep track of their belongings?

As you are getting your class ready for the cold of winter, I encourage you to step back and check for the messages you are sending the children. Sure, it’s easier and faster to do it for them, but we are teaching them to be independent children and that takes time and a belief that they are capable.

How Do You See the Child

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Let’s take a few minutes to examine our beliefs about what children can do and with what we need to help them. If we believe children are capable, we allow them time to figure things out on their own, to put their coats on by themselves, to clean up after themselves and to serve themselves at meal time among all the other things children do throughout the day. Your attitude toward a child’s capability effects your interactions, problem solving, conflict resolution and about everything that happens in your classroom. It recognizes a child’s sovereignty. Treating children with respect shows our trust in the child’s ability. It means we give them the time they need to comply with the demands of the day.

Our actions throughout the day demonstrate how we see children. Whether we see them as capable or in need of assistance. Take a step back and look at your everyday interactions with children. Are you allowing the child to try and fail and try again, or do you jump in and solve the problem for the child?

Over the next few posts, we’ll look at some common situations with young children and evaluate our interactions and where we can trust children with more autonomy.